[Paints News] Exotic dancers rejected in spite of exotic tribal dances

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Guna Yala dancers disappointed after their application as exotic dancers is rejected

 

It's not always easy, finding a job in Los Santos. One interest, however, seems to be quite constant: exotic and tribal culture. Most of the denizens of the San Andreas state saw the desperate search for exotic dancers, most likely conducted by cultural institutions of various kinds. But luckily for them, a family from the wonderful region of Guna Yala, in Panama, was ready to answer the call.

 

After preparing their traditionnal exotic dances for weeks, in order to showcase the cultural richness of their native region, they replied to several of the various ads that are plastered over Los Santos' advertisement apps. After some time waiting for their interview, they noticed most of the other candidates were local women. While their dancing skills were certainly good, they were far, far from exotic, and the family had some great hopes! 

 

 

Alas! their efforts were vain. Four different local clubs rejected their application, in spite of an absolutely monumental display of the ancestral dances of Guna Yala. Many questions crossed their minds, which they shared with us. « Is Panama not exotic enough? Should we have chosen other dances? » they wondered as they left the very last interview of the day. « It's strange, though, » one of them noticed, « because one of the dancers they hired wasn't looking very exotic. She looked very American. ». Paints News confirmed the woman in question is indeed from Sandy Shores. 

 

When interrogated, the owners had no good explanation to give, overall. Some mentioned the standards expected by their clientele, others that they were looking for a « different type of dancing » altogether. The last, however, seems to have been the victim of a sad misunderstanding. When we inquired, he concluded: « Nah, now I'll just say strippers in my ad, because if I ever have to waste my time like that again, Imma fucking kill someone... ».

 

Paints news is a news outlet, providing the most dubious information from the less reliable sources. Nothing we post should be taken as fact, unless you really have no critical sense. For more not-so-dependable information, do follow us on Facebrowser. We cannot, however, offer you exotic dances.