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The Dream Is Always the Same


catdanny

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8 minutes ago, catdanny said:
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Well hello, Harmony.

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Whatcha doing for free?

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Yeah, get on your knees, you freak.
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And please, please me.

 

 

ummm these arent asmongold clips wtf catdanny

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May 10th, Davis Station

There have been a lot of changes around Davis.

Budget cuts.

Reassignments.

Resignations.

-----

You could try and rationalize it a hundred different ways.

It's all the same to you, in the end.

You're still here by yourself.

You're still missing your Great Value heroes.

-----

Ostrowski is one of the only ones left that you know.

Her, Marv, Castillo and that's about it.

Donald's gone, Mendoza's gone, Ed's gone.

You thought you'd work side-by-side forever, but, life got in the way of that.

-----

Sarah's a strange bird, it's hard to tell what she's thinking because of it.

She talked about recommending you and Brett to DD.

You're not sure you're ready for an assignment like that.

Yet there are so many shoes unfilled that maybe you'll have to.

-----

There are so many things you wanted to do with the rest of them.

So many things you still wanted to say.

You feel like you're by yourself, now, in a sea of strangers.

It's going to take your a minute to gather your bearings, then find yourself again.

 

(( To my friends. ))

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(( With all of the recent departures from the Sheriff's Dept lately, I just wanted to commemorate some of the good times I've had with the people who're gone. I joined the faction to play with a lot of the faces who're just vacant spaces, now, and I think it's going to take me an awful while to get over that fact.

I don't think I've ever been so tremendously let down over a video game in a really long time.

Nevertheless, I'm going to keep this character going as far as the journey will take her. Keep on keeping on. The faction won't ever be the same without you.

Love. ))

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Edited by catdanny
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May 16th, Rancho

 

Horowitz grooms a junior deputy attached to her unit for a warrant, helping him get hands on experience and learn what the big dogs do out on the street.

 

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Your two cents is worthless.

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Makin' me nervous.

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Heard your shit.

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It's like you're tryin' to be wack on purpose.

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Proficient at killin' off every wack M-C.

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And it'll stay that way until I D-I-E.

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Edited by catdanny
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A badge

A symbol of authority.

A license to kill.
Hated by most.
A means to an end, for you.

 

You can't call yourself peaceful if you're not capable of violence.

If you're not capable of violence, you're not peaceful.

You're harmless.

 

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May 28th, Richman

What a long, strange journey it's been.

You've been so busy these past few weeks.

You've not sat down for a good while to think about life.

Your life.

-----

Life is a precious thing.

You forget that, sometimes, in your line of work.

You sometimes often feel that it isn't, for these people.

It makes you wonder if one day you'll lose sight of what you came here to do in the first place.

-----

You saw your mother, yesterday.

She gave you a few old photos for your album.

You have a hard time sitting down and talking to her.

She asks about work, but you don't know how to tell her what it's really like.

-----

You didn't tell her about Gangs; she thinks you're a cute little patrol deputy.

She said you're handsome in uniform, when you graduated.

She's not seen you with another deputy's blood on your hands, heaving through chest compressions.

She's not seen you point a weapon at a child.

-----

You didn't sleep much after that.

Sat in bed crying till sun up, then went to work.

You don't recognize the person in those photographs when you look at them.

The past ten years summarized in a few still frames.

-----

What has only been one chapter of your life feels like a lifetime ago.

A long, distant memory.

Everyone told you that you would change, in this line of work.

It killed something inside of you, to finally be able to see the culmination.

-----

You make yourself sick, you think.

You're angry at the world and it makes you want to scream for the heavens.

You reckon that wouldn't accomplish a whole lot.

Still, you think of things you shouldn't.

-----

Finger On The Eject Button has become more than just an unpleasant thought.

Contemplation has led you to wondering what would happen, if you stuck your barrel between your teeth.

The train left at five, like it always does.

Don't forget the safety next time, coward.
 



"The past ten years summarized in a few still frames."

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Edited by catdanny
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May 31st, Davis

 

One step forward, two steps back. Deputy Horowitz cuts a felon loose on a smaller charge, trying to see the best in her community.

 

Her good deed is later overridden by a thought-provoking conversation with a pair of colleagues.


Horowitz talks a lot of talk, for someone who is still yet to use her firearm on another human being.

 

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Edited by catdanny
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June 2nd, Davis Station

You often ask yourself about guys like Mulholland.

Man's old enough to be your grandfather.

Yet he's still rolling it in a patrol car.

Still more capable than most guys you know.

-----

He pulled you out of a bad spot.

You don't panic often, but today you did.

Several animals on your car with bricks and who knew what else.

He pulled up, shotgun in hand.

-----

It didn't take long for them to disperse, after that.

They knew he wasn't fucking around.

The look he gave you said enough.

You feel worse disappointing him than anything else.

-----

His scrutinizing gazes make you better.

They do so, because you don't want them set on you.

You stand a little bit taller when he's in the room.

You work a little harder, too.

-----

You're not certain he likes you.

Frankly, you're not certain he likes anybody.

You're not sure what it is about him.

You can't quite put your thumb on why you even care.

-----

Most people would tell you the guy's a dated relic, that his opinion's twenty years expired.

Those same people aren't the ones who came to help you, today.

You wouldn't have it any other way.
You can't help but wonder what he was like in his prime.

 

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Horowitz takes part in grilling a new boot with the Big Game Hunter, and a couple of other deputies.

To be a boot with hair is to commit a cardinal sin in the Sheriff's Department.

 

The deputies were quick to remedy this.

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Edited by catdanny
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June 3rd, Vespucci

 

Horowitz submits to an IAB investigation regarding a previous arrest, then gets on with her life.

 

Along the way, she trades one fish for a bigger fish.

 

 

 

"Well can you tell, a wish from a spell? A hug from a lie? They both make you feel so gone."

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Edited by catdanny
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The Second Week of June


Do you ever feel like there's blood on your hands?

Every day.

 

Do you have a hard time washing it off?

You're afraid to try.

If you never do, you can convince yourself it might come off.

Do you ever think about spilling your own blood?

You plead the fifth.

Has your job tarnished any of your best yesterdays?
You came to terms with that one a long time ago.

 

Think of the word; Crumpled.

Just like you.

Dread of the superego.

Cessation of both the ego and the id.

A basin of trapped anima.

 

Are you afraid of tarnishing your relationships with others?

It's screaming.

It's thrashing.

Trying to get out.

You didn't even catch the question at first.
 

A heartbeat, then another.

It's less like a metronome.

More like a nervous ditty.

One you sing or hum compulsively in complete darkness.

Can you feel yourself breaking down?

Yes.

But who do you tell?
We're trapped in the belly of this horrible machine.

And the machine is bleeding to death.

 

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