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Murica Chopper


Caryington

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==Murica Chopper==

Make Taxi great again

 

Ever needed a taxi?

Course ya did! Ya do remember that day, right-o? Heavy rain, cold wind, got turned down by yar date, not enough cash for a quickie with little Mrs STD-collection, too much booze and headache… You –DO- remember that horrific day.

 

How did ya get home and wank yarself?

Lookin’ forward to tha’ lonely solitude of your dirty motel room, ya tried to hail one of these ugly cab cars on the street! And what happened? None of these ever-complaining slackers stopped! And when one of them did, he charged ya a frak load by going the loooooooooooong way ‘round, drivin’ through all the bumps there was to drive thru, while imposing his savage third-world music…

 

Why is that you ask?

Ain’t no nice way to blurt the truth out. All them taxi-drivers are illegal Pakistani and the only customer they ever accept is a red-spandex-dressed pile-of-cancer antihero.

 

You think this cannot be allowed to continue any longer?

Ya’re right and, at Murica Chopper, we got the fuckin’ solution for y’all!

 

What d’we offer?

  • ·         A ride from wherever you want to wherever ya want, from Los Santos International Airport and all the way up north to Paleto Bay.

  • ·         A ride on an iconic Western Motorcycle Company Nightblade, with a custom American-pride paintjob.

  • ·         A real-American backwater Louisianan driver that don’t ship your hard earned dollars oversea to fund war or child labour in any of 'em disgusting third-world-godforsaken countries.

  • ·         A radio tuned to Rebel Radio because Country music is in the heart of any real American citizen!

  • ·         A cheap flat rate of seventy-five dollars. Yes, you read it right! Only seventy-five good ol’ US dollars and speaking of money… Guess what? We don’ take foreigners bills! Cause we’re just that American at American Chopper!

 

So next time you need a lift?

Call Murica Chopper at 6512359!!!

 

Murica Chopper cannot be held responsible of any damage to passengers if they choose to breach basic safety rules and common sense.

Murica Chopper reserves the right to offer one way trip to the Serano Desert to bad payers.

Murica Chopper will not be held accountable for any illegal item you may carry.

Murica Chopper shall not comply to any illegal directive given no matter how much you're willing to pay.

Hopping onto Murica Chopper means you’ve read and agreed to the previous stuff in small

 

 

 

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